For 32 years of my life I was a hopeless singledom. Bridget Jones was my idol.
In my twenties, I chose the unavailable commitment phobes like Daniel Cleaver and grieved when it wouldn’t work out. I would rush head strong into relationships that fizzled as the excitement soon wore off, because I had thrown everything about myself to them in the first two weeks. Mark Darcy-types never got a look in because they were ‘safe’ and the Daniel Cleavers of the world seemed far more exciting.
In my early thirties I believed love wasn’t possible for me. Love was a privilege for other people and so I decided to just be with me and love me – and enjoy that. That’s when I met my Mark Darcy and he taught me lessons in love. Years later, these are the 10 things I have learnt about love:
1. Love is taking a risk and changing your life to complement the needs of another.
2. Love is tender, respectful kisses on the forehead.
3. Love is lying in green grass in the sun, with no words – just holding hands.
4. Love is by your side in times of trouble and not walking out the door. Love stays.
5. Love is shedding a tear when the other is in pain.
6. Love is having your absolute worst, most embarrassing moment – that you wish no one would ever witness – and you hear, “I love you!”
7. Love is revealing your beliefs and inner soul, that could be controversial or disliked, and you hear, “I like that about you.”
8. Love is phone calls with some text messages – not text messages with no phone calls.
9. Love doesn’t mean you have to hang from the chandeliers… all the time.
10. Love is revealing one page at a time about yourself to keep them reading.
No one can know what happens next, but these are lessons that will stay with me for life. What are your lessons about love?